"Some Girls Rape Easy"

That's a thing Wisconsin State Rep. Roger Rivard said. His explanation for saying it is perhaps even worse in context than out of it. Claiming that this was part of his father's advice not to have premarital sex, Rivard explains it like this to the Journal Sentinal.
 
"He also told me one thing, 'If you do (have premarital sex), just remember, consensual sex can turn into rape in an awful hurry,' " Rivard said. "Because all of a sudden a young lady gets pregnant and the parents are madder than a wet hen and she's not going to say, 'Oh, yeah, I was part of the program.' All that she has to say or the parents have to say is it was rape because she's underage. And he just said, 'Remember, Roger, if you go down that road, some girls,' he said, 'they rape so easy.'

"What the whole genesis of it was, it was advice to me, telling me, 'If you're going to go down that road, you may have consensual sex that night and then the next morning it may be rape.' So the way he said it was, 'Just remember, Roger, some girls, they rape so easy. It may be rape the next morning.'

"So it's been kind of taken out of context."

Here's the thing with that "advice." Because there's so much victim blaming and doubt when it comes to rape, people have been able to come up with myriad excuses why screaming rape is false. This is just another example of that, downplaying these incidents and discrediting women who are raped, placing the onus on them when they are attacked or violated.

Comments like this make sure that there's always a hint of doubt in someone's mind when there are rape accusations, which makes it harder and harder for women to feel comfortable coming forward, making it a shameful process.

Certainly there are times when women falsely accuse men of rape, which is always discouraging--a one step forward, two steps back type of thing, but we can't continue to perpetuate and deconstruct rape so it doesn't seem as ugly as it actually is. We're already stuck in a backwards time where forcible rape is now a term. And when political candidates claim it's harder for women to get pregnant if they're raped. Their bodies reject the sperm, you see. No big deal, you guys, because some girls rape easy.

A Bit of the Old Ultra-Violence

In regards to Chris Brown being a misogynist asshole, I certainly have a lot of thoughts. Typically, I have a zero tolerance policy for men who hit women, unless, of course said women are asking for it or if you've already established a safe word with your partner (for future reference, mine fluctuates between Olivia Benson and Cinnamon, depending on how I'm feeling).

I'm not going to contribute anything new to this conversation about Chris Brown and his freak out at "Good Morning America" last week. His visceral violent reaction to things isn't shocking though it is a bit disheartening. Chris Brown comes across as not being self-conscious of how he's perceived because famous rappers have come to his defense, who are often misogynist in their own right. As a society, we love an epic redemption story, and it seems that for famous men that abuse women, we give them a free pass. Chris Brown and Charlie Sheen's tiger blood exempt them from public scrutiny or backlash.

In all honestly, in the past two years, Chris Brown has been known more for hitting Rihanna than his music. Let's not forgot that his punishment consisted of community service and anger management classes, which I'm not sure are working exactly. He wasn't even sent to jail! So, if Robin Roberts, a journalist, wants to say, "Hey, Chris Brown, you haven't physically abused a woman in a while...why not?" then ask it. I want Chris Brown to be uncomfortable and dance (get it? Because he's a good dancer, guys) around the question.

The Chris Brown thing, I can turn a blind eye to, but I'm just disappointed in ABC (for the Grey's Anatomy musical episode, for canceling Pushing Daisies) but also for how they passively dealt with the situation. Instead of banning him from future shows or even publicly flogging him, they welcomed him back, letting him get away with his deviant behavior.

Chris Brown, what a droog.

I just want us to be done with Chris Brown. We have Bruno Mars now, and he only has a cocaine habit. And from what I can tell, he would catch a grenade for me instead of throwing it at me for looking at his text messages.

It's Not Rape Rape

The H.R. 3 bill - the "No Taxpayer Funding For Abortion Act" - that John Boehner and the new House are posing as some form of legitimate legislation is certainly one of the worst ideas ever. Worse then going ahead withthe Sex and the City 2 movie? Yes, even worse than that.

I can't break down the exact facts and phrasing that this bill suggests, and Maria did it pretty well, but, like my fellow feminists out there, the fact that it redefines rape and seemingly creates some sort of terror-alert advisory system for what qualifies as rape or who deserves abortions based on rape. Or if one rape is worse than other forms of rape is scary, disheartening and brings society one step closer to making those designer hangers for clandestine abortions.

In Sady Doyle's Salon article, which articulates the repercussions that this bill has, she said something ominously honest, "It shouldn't be shocking: The goal is no abortions for rape survivors. Because the goal is no abortions, for anyone." This is just one, in a laundry list of ways, in which women's reproductive rights are compromised by someone else making choices about complicated lady issues that the hegemony (yeah, I went there) intends to simplify as much as possible.

This blog, in many ways, and rightfully so, has a major Olivia Benson boner, and it makes sense, because her story is so similar to what H.R. 3 is trying to control. Olivia, in her dark and storied history, is a child of rape and is also a victim of her own sexual-assault. Of course, I'm not saying Olivia should have been aborted. But in alternate world, we'd have to assume her mother's rape was not "forcible rape," whatever that means. Her mother was drunk? Her mother was unconscious? Her mother was 14 and her rapist was 56? Her mother was bi-polar (Does this explain Britney Spears' children?). Well, it wasn't rape rape, so we can breathe easy?

But, to take this further, to Doyle's point, we can look at the abortion doctor in Pennsylvania, whose clinic turned out to be just a house of horrors of fetus limbs, cat feces and poorly-cared for women, in what is arguably one of the of the worst-case-scenario situations for abortion-rights activists. This is not what The Cider House Rules intended, guys! Things that were found:

*Fetuses, fetal remains and dismembered baby parts — especially, for some reason, baby feet — in bags, jars, milk jugs and cat-food containers kept around the clinic, in the freezer and in the basement; some containers were stored in the same refrigerator where clinic staff kept their lunches
*Instruments that were not properly sterilized or discarded, which allegedly spread venereal disease to several patients
*Cats roaming and excreting freely in the filthy clinic

My initial reaction to reading that was shock and horror that made my gag reflex work overtime. My second thought, well, I hate admitting this because I'm a self-described radical feminist, but I thought "maybe abortions are a bad idea. EEK!" But after some contemplation, this case is the perfect example of why we need Reproduction Rights that benefit women (poor women, really, who ultimately suffer the most because of these abortion/rape restrictions), so they can get some sort of tax-funded abortions without having to die in the process. This is a unique case (one hopes), but it does make us see the lengths women will go to in order to get an abortion, and it foreshadows what H.R. 3 will eventually lead to, if it passes (which it won't). It's a slippery slope to redefine rape, and it's even worse when we can't define rape now, when victim-bashing still happens, when Ben Roethlisberger can rape girls and we, as a society, accept his excuse because "she was probably asking for it."

Before I get off my rapey soap box without even a witty quip en tow, I will say that, it certainly doesn't help when we have EGOT winner Whoopi Goldberg defending the most heinous crimes, who introduced "rape rape" into the lexicon, who doesn't include statutory rape in her definition of "rape rape," (if said rape was done by an Oscar-winning director then let's get all the facts before we convinct him).



Whoopi Goldberg and John Boehner are the future, and that's a very scary thought.

And Scene.

Olivia Benson would be piiiiiiissed

According to reputable news source Gawker, the Republican-controlled House has decided to distinguish "rape" from "forcible rape" (i.e. involving violence) in a House law aimed at making permanent existing bands on federal funding for abortion.

They report:

"...The widest criticism of the bill comes in its exemptions for rape — provisions that would allow federal money or private insurance to be used to cover an abortion. H.R. 3 says those provisions would kick in only in cases of forcible rape, a distinction from other forms rape of that is largely undefined but seems to suggest that a rape that doesn't include violence wouldn't count. The bill would also limit the incest exemption to women under the age of 18 — meaning a victim of incest who was legally allowed to vote wouldn't have her abortion covered by Medicaid and would likely have more limited access to private insurance than she does today.

The health provision would also limit abortion coverage to cases where the woman's physical health was in danger if she gives birth. That would close a supposed loophole some abortion opponents have been talking about for years, in which doctors factor mental health in health-of-the mother decisions. (You can read the entire House bill here.)"

All I can really stomach to say now is.....what ASSFACES! I'm glad that victims of rape, incest or mental illness would receive limited protection by fitting into nice, neat little demographic squares. Ladies, make sure your baby-daddy rapist breaks your nose or rib cage in the act!!

Things That Excite Me

The Feminist Art center at the Brooklyn Museum. Now featuring this whimsical exhibit, Judy Chicago's "The Dinner Party," which sets a place for iconic and historic lady figures at a triangle-shaped table. I bet if they were all really there, they'd do a lot of eating.....out. Sorry.

Things That Bother Me

This past week Ben Roethlisberger, Steelers quarterback/serial rapist, got engaged. To a (self-loathing?) woman, no less. This was, apparently, a consensual agreement between Ben and his future wife (a first for him?). However, this begs the question, how did Ben Roethlisberger, who just last summer was involved in his SECOND, maybe third, rape scandal, convince a woman to marry him. Wait, where have I seen this before...
One of the most confusing aspects of all of this is the fact that I neither have raped nor have been raped, and yet no one wants to marry me. But a lot of my anger is this lingering feeling that Big Ben does not respect women. Instead he exemplifies the patriarchy, in that he feels entitled to possess things: women, money, endorsements, Super Bowl rings, etc. And we're willing to forgive him as long as he promises to win aforementioned Super Bowl rings.

When your Google search dictates that there are more Ben Roethlisberger rape articles then Ben Roethlisberger athlete articles, you know you're doing something right!


As a feminist, which I'm qualifying for the sake of this discussion, Ben's summer indiscretions in Georgia left me reeling. What's more, it made me even more wary of how we handle (and discuss) rape in our society. The details of that night are blurry, and yet things are also abundantly clear: Something bad happened. And in light of his recent engagement and a Steelers winning season, it seems easy to forgive and forget because, well, he's winning football games!

Let's take into account, however, that Ben took advantage of a 20-year-old girl, whom he met in a bar called The Velvet Elvis. The Velvet Elvis. In Milledgeville, Georgia. This sounds like an SVU episode, except Olivia Benson doesn't stand for sexual manipulation. She will cut a bitch. No, that doesn't sound right. She would cut his dick off.
Let's go back to that night in sexy Milledgeville, Georgia, where we just left the sultry Velvet Elvis for another club in the area. Ben's victim said a bodyguard took her arm and escorted her to a hallway, sat her down on a stool (sexy?) until Ben "came back with his penis out of his pants." She told him it "wasn't OK. No, we don't need to do this," and he told her it was OK. So, by all means, it certainly must have been OK. Between Ben Roethlisberger and Brett Favre, I've dealt with enough underwhelming NFL penises to last a lifetime.

There are lot of things that anger me about this incident. The fact that people blame this girl for being drunk. For accepting shots from Ben. For perhaps being starry-eyed and excited about seeing a celebrity. These things are probably all true, and yet, that's not a defense for how she was treated, disrespected and violated as a woman. When we start subjecting women to an onslaught of criticism for social behavior, then we'll also relegating them to an inferior position, in that women don't have the freedom to make the same choices as men because it could lead to uncomfortable circumstances. This is meaningless minutia, really, and leads to a slippery slope when look to blame people in terms of rape.

The fact that we can apologize for Be's behavior, and unquestionably place him back upon his pedestal is discouraging, especially in our society, where we tend to glamorize athletes, especially when they take our Fantasy Football teams to the championship game. At times it seems that when the hubris of an athlete contributes to a proverbial fall from grace, we tend to point fingers at the victim. "She asked for it." "She deserved it." "She shouldn't have followed him into the bathroom, if she didn't want it." These don't justify his behavior, and I hope that he's reformed in a way that he can truly appreciate the rejection of women.

In the essence, of not raping a dead horse, let's just say that Ben's impending nuptials make me feel queasy. Can't we just continue raping countries and stop raping women?

In which I Defend Ke$ha's Vagina

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